Enough With Health Foods!

I was walking across campus today accompanied by the sounds of my stomach rumbling and decide to stop and get some lunch, sadly my lunch was a bag of Ruffles I got out of the vending machine. On the bag was a label that proudly read: "made with 100% real sunflower juice". What the hell does that mean? Even worse this kind of stuff is everywhere! Countless snack foods are littered with the phrase "0 grams Trans fat". Of course look at the nutrition facts on these foods and they still have high amounts of fat and cholesterol, but hey there is no Trans fat! It does not matter what you eat today anyway, everything is bad. Unless you grow it and cook it organically without any flavor the food you are eating is probably bad for you, or so it seems. I go by the simple slogan, the less taste the healthier it is. What about Michelob Ultra? Apparently it is a low carb beer that people think they can binge drink on and not get a beer gut. Do not get me started on carbs, my rant would grow to long. I blame all of this stuff on Subway. Subway started running adds (earlier this century) about how much healthier they were then some stores. They said they were much healthier than McDonalds, then proceeded to prove their point by matching up their healthiest sub (some no taste sub with no cheese or any goodies on it) to McDonald's most unhealthy menu item, the Big Mac. Never mind McDonalds has a number of menu items comparable to Subway's taste free healthy sub, but Subway also has a number of menu items comparable to McDonalds cholesterol filled Big Mac. But McDonalds is the bad guy? I just miss when someone used to tell me what to eat and made all my meals, that was an easier day. I did not make any decisions. In fact I want that back, I think I am going to hire a cook. Anyone out there want to work for low wages making me food every day?