I Love the Olympics

I love the Olympics, plain and simple. Never would I ever watch such random sporting events with the maintained interest that I have while currently watching the Olympics. Gymnastics, swimming, table tennis, hell it is all good when it's on the world's biggest stage. A few points I want to touch on:

• I love the announcers of sports like gymnastics. You see someone come up for a gymnastic event and the announcer will be like, "she completely nailed this routine in the 2007 World Championship Qualifying meet" or "she was all SEC at LSU in this event". These announcers must only work once every four years, so I wonder what they do during their free time.
• Water polo and fencing are two sports that don't translate to the big screen. You can't even see where the ball is in water polo. I have no idea what is going on, even as the announcer is breaking down the defensive philosophies for a bunch of dudes swimming around in a pool. It is almost impossible to tell who got the scoring hit in fencing. Usually the two square up, both strike, and it's over in a few seconds and someone screams. You don't really know who scored until the scoreboard updates itself.
  
• It is amazing how intense swimming is to watch. I really enjoy it and I know that once the Olympics ends I won't think about it again until 2012. Michael Phelps has been the man to watch in his Olympics, like watching Jordan in his prime.
• Speaking of swimming, one of the better moments of the Olympics was the team relay. France talked a lot of shit how they were going to crush the USA and they were in the lead for almost the entire race. The USA, however, made an amazing comeback and shut the Frenchies up. Leave it to a Frenchman to talk shit during the Olympics.
  
• Am I gay for watching gymnastics? I am gonna say no, and if you think I am then you have the problem.
  
• It is nice to watch an all-star team like Team USA basketball play together and play defense. I don't know if this team will win the gold, but if they don't it wont be because of the debacles they suffered in recent years.
  

So I tuned into woman's gymnastics coverage tonight in order to watch Shawn Johnson, the much hyped 16 year old USA Olympian. Shawn John (as we call her) is from West Des Moines, Iowa, so that is cool. She is most likely going to win a gold this year as she is probably the best gymnast in the world right now. Here is what I want to happen with her career: I want her to win a gold this year and get famous (which is very likely). Then, in 2012 at the London Games, she needs to flame out, like she totally biffs it on the balance bar and loses a shot at the metal for her team and herself. After this horrible event she retires from the sport, at age 20, and falls into obscurity. One day in 2018 you'll be at some dive bar in West Des Moines and you will see Shawn, alone, at the bar on her 5th shot of bourbon while watching the World Gymnastics Championship on some 19 inch, barely color TV. After watching someone masterfully preform on the balance bar she throws her shot glass at the TV and screams "do you know who I am? I'm Shawn Johnson dammit!"

Yeah that would be fun, and also really random. But wait, there is more:

So in 2019 something terrible happens to the woman's Olympic team that is heading to the 2020 games. All of the sudden six new performers are needed. A representative of the woman's team flies to West Des Monies to find Shawn Johnson. They need her back. "Why Me?" She asks. To that the representative will reply, "why you Shawn? Because you used to be the best!"

Yes, yes, this is what I want to see happen. Sounds like a good movie. I'll start working on the screen play. After the Olympics, that is.